1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Hi Guest Wondering How To Switch to LCHF Diet? Check Here
    Dismiss Notice
Welcome dLife.in Community!

If you are new here, please take time to READ THIS and then signup for account. Please make sure you check your SPAM folder for email validation mail. Also white-list @dlife.in in your mail client.

Laughter - The Best Medicine

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Recyan, Mar 9, 2015.

  1. P N Chandra

    P N Chandra yes please change avtar

    Messages:
    1,896
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Navi Mumbai, Maharashtra
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    11Mar 98
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    एक दादा और एक दादी ने
    अपनी जवानी के दिनों को
    ताज़ा और relive करने की सोची.
    उन्होन्ने प्लान किया कि
    वो एक बार
    शादी से पहले के दिनों की तरह
    छुप कर
    नदी किनारे मिलेंगे.
    .
    .
    .

    दादा तैयार शैयार होकर,
    बांके स्टाइल वाला बाल संवार कर, लंबी टहनी वाला
    खूबसूरत लाल गुलाब
    हाथ में लेकर
    नदी किनारे की
    पुरानी जगह पहूंच गये.
    उनका उत्सुक इंतज़ार
    शुरू हो गया.
    ताज़ी ठंढी हवा
    बहुत रोमैंटिक लग रही थी.
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    एक घंटा गुजरा,
    दूसरा भी,
    यहां तक कि तीसरा भी .
    पर दादी
    दूर दूर तक नहीं दिखी.
    दादा अपना सेलफोन भी
    नहीं ले गये थे
    क्यों कि
    उनके तब के वक्त में तो
    PCO भी नहीं होते थे.
    नदी किनारे तो नहीं ही.
    .
    .
    .
    दादा को फ़िक्र नहीं हुई,
    बहुत गुस्सा आया .
    झल्लाते हुए घर पहुंचे .
    .......
    ...
    तो देखा
    ...
    ...
    दादी
    कुर्सी पर बैठी
    मुस्करा रही थी.
    .
    दादा,
    लाल पीले होते हुए
    .....
    .
    ...

    " तुम आयीं क्यों नहीं ?"

    दादी,
    शरमाते हुए.:noidea::noidea:

    ."मम्मी ने आने नहीं दिया.":cry::cry:;);)
     
  2. P N Chandra

    P N Chandra yes please change avtar

    Messages:
    1,896
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Navi Mumbai, Maharashtra
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    11Mar 98
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    Husband instruction to wife before Ind vs Pak final...

    My Dear Wife;
    This Sunday its India vs Pakistan. Let me give you a few rules that will preserve your beauty.

    1. The remote control belongs to me for the whole day.
    2. Tell all your friends not to give birth or wed or die or whatever during the match coz we won't go.
    3. You support the team that I support.
    4. No talking during the game, wait for break or end of the game.
    5. Repeats & Replays are as good as the live match, so am gonna watch them..
    6. You don't just pass in front of the TV if i'm watching the match, you better crawl on the floor.
    8. Make sure you don't ask silly questions such as; is this Hyderabad versus Mumbai . This is not IPL?
    9. No funny faces to any of my emotions displayed during match
    10. Smile everytime EXCEPT when my team is losing.

    Thank you,

    GENTLEMEN'S ASSOCIATION :):):)
     
  3. arun kumar

    arun kumar Moderator

    Messages:
    6,537
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Patna, Bihar
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    1995
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    Was these instructions for Cricket or Hockey match?
     
    Recyan likes this.
  4. P N Chandra

    P N Chandra yes please change avtar

    Messages:
    1,896
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Navi Mumbai, Maharashtra
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    11Mar 98
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    मैच हारने के बाद ?? .
    धोनी की माँ :
    ‘बेटा ज़रा मार्केट से सब्जी ले आना’।
    धोनी : ‘नहीं माँ पब्लिक मारेगी’।
    माँ : "मेरी साड़ी पहन के जा, कोई नहीं पहचानेगा…॥

    (मार्केट में .... धोनी साड़ी पहन के ...) तभी अचानक एक औरत बोली - "कैसे हो ??धोनी ??’।

    ओ तेरी !!!!! धोनी( चकरा गया ) : ‘आपको कैसे पता चला??’

    औरत : ‘अबे मैं कोहली हूँ अनुष्का की साड़ी है ।
    :D:D:D:D
    --- Post Auto Merged ---
    Cricket match !!!:cry::cry::banghead::banghead:
     
  5. Recyan

    Recyan Moderator

    Messages:
    3,367
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Mumbai
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    Airman Jones was assigned to the induction center where he was to advise new recruits about their government benefits, especially their GI insurance.

    It wasn't long before Captain Smith noticed that Airman Jones had almost a 100% record for insurance sales, which had never happened before.

    Rather than ask about this, the Captain stood in the back of the room and listened to Jones's sales pitch.

    Jones explained the basics of the GI Insurance to the new recruits, and then said:
    If you have GI Insurance and go into battle and are killed, the government has to pay $200,000 to your beneficiaries. If you don't have GI insurance, and you go into battle and get killed, the government has to pay only a maximum of $6000."

    "Now," he concluded, "Which bunch do you think they are going to send into battle first?"
     
  6. Ramgopal

    Ramgopal Moderator

    Messages:
    4,239
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Hyderabad
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    01/01/2008
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    Tragedy of today's India :confused:

    The richest (industrialists) and
    the poorest (farmers) of India want loan waiver..

    Middle class are born just to pay Taxes and EMIs lifetime... :D
     
    arun kumar, S_antosh, Recyan and 3 others like this.
  7. P N Chandra

    P N Chandra yes please change avtar

    Messages:
    1,896
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Navi Mumbai, Maharashtra
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    11Mar 98
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    Three men - an American, a Japanese and an Irishman - were sitting naked in a sauna.

    Suddenly there was a beeping sound. The American pressed his forearm and the beep stopped. The others looked at him questioningly.

    "That was my pager," he said. "I have a microchip under the skin of my arm."

    A few minutes later a phone rang.

    The Japanese fellow lifted his palm to his ear. When he finished, he explained, "That was my mobile phone. I have a microchip in my hand."

    The Irishman felt decidedly low tech and, not wanting to be outdone, he decided he had to do something just as impressive. He stepped out of the sauna and went to the bathroom. He returned with a piece of toilet paper hanging from his behind.

    The others raised their eyebrows and stared at him.

    "It appears that you've got a bit a of a stuck paper problem there," pointed the amused American.

    "Well, will you look at that. I must be getting a fax!" Declared the Irishman.:D:D:D
     
  8. Anup Singh

    Anup Singh Admin

    Messages:
    10,951
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Indore, India
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    14-02-2011
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    I guess we need BJP rule for 2 decades.
    If we look at inflation figures trend between BJP/Congress period for this century, it would reveal that CONGRESS are great at "CON" work. BJP hands them at 5% and they take it to 12%.
     
    S_antosh, Recyan and Ramgopal like this.
  9. Ramgopal

    Ramgopal Moderator

    Messages:
    4,239
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Hyderabad
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    01/01/2008
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    You ask your wife something and she says,
    "wahan rakha hai.."
    This "wahan" can be either:
    1. on the table
    2. or any of the 26 drawers in kitchen
    3. or even Antarctica..!!!

    When wife say, "woh laa do.."..
    It can be:
    1. her Lipstick
    2. or milk from market
    3. or an AK 56..!!!

    When wife says "yeh kya hai..??"
    It can be:
    1. your Pyjamas on the floor
    2. Shoes lying around
    3. or a Drone flying over Afghanistan.!!

    When wife says, "tumhe kabhi kuch samajh nahi aata.."...
    It can be about
    1. a new mushy WhatsApp msg
    2. or Einstein's Theory of Relativity
    3. or her latest spending spree in Mall...!

    When wife says, "abb bohot ho gaya..." ...
    It can be
    1. the mascara she is putting
    2. or the amount of Anthrax that needs to be put in a Biological Weapon
    3. or the latest spat she had...with your mother..!!!

    And....when wife says, "main kaisi lag rahi hoon?"
    Its GAME OVER.
    It doesn't have any meaning...
    except confirmed annihilation.
    It just puts you in a fix which Arjun had faced....
    just before the War started in Mahabharata ...
    as to whether you should follow Dharma ....or Karma...!!!:noidea:

    DEDICATED TO MY MARRIED FRIENDS
     
  10. Jugnu M Shah

    Jugnu M Shah Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    298
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    India
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    01-03-2014
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    Explain please!
    --- Post Auto Merged ---
    20 Selected Great Lines!


    1. Regular naps prevent old age...
    Especially if you take them while driving.

    2. Having one child makes you a parent;
    having two makes you a referee.

    3. Marriage is a relationship in
    which one person is always right
    and the other is the husband!

    4. They said we should all pay
    our tax with a smile.
    I tried- but they wanted cash.

    5. A child's greatest period of growth
    is the month after you've purchased
    new school uniforms.


    6. Don't feel bad.
    A lot of people have no talent.

    7. Don't marry the person you want to live with,
    marry the one you cannot live without...
    But whatever you do, you'll regret it later.

    8. You can't buy love. .
    But you pay heavily for it.

    9. True friends stab you in the front.

    10. Forgiveness is giving up my
    right to hate you for hurting me.

    11. Bad officials are elected by
    good citizens who do not vote.

    12. Laziness is nothing more than
    the habit of resting before you get tired.

    13. My wife and I always compromise.
    I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me.

    14. Those who can't laugh at themselves
    leave the job to others.

    15. Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.

    16. It doesn't matter how often a
    married man changes his job,
    he still ends up with the same boss.

    17. They call our language the
    mother tongue because the father
    seldom gets to speak.

    18. Saving is the best thing.
    Especially when your parents
    have done it for you.

    19. Wise men talk because they
    have something to say;
    fools talk because
    they have to say something.

    20. Real friends are the ones who
    survive transitions between address books.
     
  11. P N Chandra

    P N Chandra yes please change avtar

    Messages:
    1,896
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Navi Mumbai, Maharashtra
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    11Mar 98
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    एक लड़की स्कूटी लेके सब्जीमंडी गयी
    लड़की – मुझे सारे सड़े सड़े अमरुद दे दो

    ठेलेवाला – सारे सड़े हुए ?

    लड़की – हां सारे खराब अमरुद दे दो

    ठेलेवाले ने सारे सड़े अमरूद
    एक पॉलीथिन में भर दिये

    लड़की – अब इस पॉलिथीन को साइड में रखो

    और साफ़ अमरुद में से 1 किलो दे दो

    बता भाई कौन कहता है लड़कियों में दिमाग नहीं होता:hurray::hurray:
     
    S_antosh, Recyan, arun kumar and 2 others like this.
  12. Anup Singh

    Anup Singh Admin

    Messages:
    10,951
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Indore, India
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    14-02-2011
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    A vendor with some sense of humor:
    One lady approaches a egg vendor on roadside who is sitting on ground with his lot of eggs to sell.
    Lady: Bhaiya ande kaisay diye?
    Vendor: Baith kay diye :D :D :D
     
    S_antosh, Recyan, arun kumar and 2 others like this.
  13. P N Chandra

    P N Chandra yes please change avtar

    Messages:
    1,896
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Navi Mumbai, Maharashtra
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    11Mar 98
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    एक पण्डित जी
    एक दिन एक बच्चे से उलझ गये ।
    बच्चे ने भी एक प्रश्न दाग दिया कि,
    "वो कौन-सी वस्तु है, जो कभी अपवित्र नहीं होती......?"

    पण्डित जी टोपी उतार कर पसीने-पसीने हो गये, मगर, उस बच्चे के प्रश्न का जवाब नहीं दे पाये ।
    आखिर, हार मान कर बोले, चल तू बता ।

    बच्चे ने कहा कि कभी न अपवित्र होने वाली वस्तु है,
    टैन्ट हाउस के गद्दे, जिसे......
    हिन्दू,-मुसलमान से ले कर पण्डित, चमार, डोम और भंगी तक इस्तेमाल करते हैं ।

    ये गद्दे मैयत से लेकर पूजा पण्डाल तक और धार्मिक कथा से ले कर उठावनी तक हर मौके पर बिछते हैं ।
    इनको कोई सुतक भी नहीं लगता ।

    बाराती भी इन गद्दों पर सोम-रस पीने के बाद वमन करते हैं ।

    छोटे बच्चों को सुविधानुसार इन पर पेशाब करा दिया जाता है ।
    इतना ही नहीं, इन पर बिछी चादरों से जूते भी चमका लियेे जाते हैं ।:D

    हद तो तब होती है, जब हलवाई इन चादरों में पनीर का चक्का लटका देता है ।
    उसी पनीर से क्या मजे का मटर-पनीर बनता है....:D:D
    पण्डित चारों खाने चित था.....!!:banghead::banghead:

    बच्चा पण्डित जी पर पानी के छीटे मार रहा था......!!:D
     
  14. P N Chandra

    P N Chandra yes please change avtar

    Messages:
    1,896
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Navi Mumbai, Maharashtra
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    11Mar 98
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    _*Yoga Tips :*

    *******Extremely Important for ALL married men**"*******

    पत्नी कुछ भी कहे तो
    गर्दन को दो बार ऊपर से नीचे करें ,

    *ये सर्वश्रेष्ट योग है,*

    यह योग न सिर्फ आपको बीपी, अनिद्रा, बेचैनी, चिढ़चिढ़ापन इत्यादि रोगों से बचाता है बल्कि यह योग आपके खुशहाल जीवन की कुँजी है....

    नोट : *गर्दन को कभी भी दाँये से बाँये न घुमावें, ये जान लेवा हो सकता है…*:D:D:D
     
  15. Ramgopal

    Ramgopal Moderator

    Messages:
    4,239
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Hyderabad
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    01/01/2008
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
  16. Ramgopal

    Ramgopal Moderator

    Messages:
    4,239
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Hyderabad
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    01/01/2008
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
  17. P N Chandra

    P N Chandra yes please change avtar

    Messages:
    1,896
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Navi Mumbai, Maharashtra
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    11Mar 98
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    My wonderful YOGA slogan this International Yoga day :

    'Dear Yoga, तू हमसे ना HOGA' !:barefoot::banghead::banghead:
     
  18. P N Chandra

    P N Chandra yes please change avtar

    Messages:
    1,896
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Navi Mumbai, Maharashtra
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    11Mar 98
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    Sarfaraz's winning speech:

    Inshallah, the boyeeej played well today. Everyone wanting India winning the match. But god wanting us to win. God is everywhere. We win becoj God made Bumrah do No-balls.:LOL:
    Our board having no money. But we win. India having many money but no fast bowler bowling fast. India spinner no spinning the ball.

    No one coming to our country to play becoj we have terrorists but we come to play everywhere. :D
    Everyone make fun when we speak English but we win in England, :blah::blah:

    Mashallah We now more English.... :D:D:D:blah:
     
  19. Anup Singh

    Anup Singh Admin

    Messages:
    10,951
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Indore, India
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    14-02-2011
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    Have you heard the chant Sachinnnn!!! Sachinnnn ?!!

    I wonder how people in Pakistan are cheering for Fakhar !!

    viaWA
     
    S_antosh, P N Chandra and Hariharan like this.
  20. P N Chandra

    P N Chandra yes please change avtar

    Messages:
    1,896
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Navi Mumbai, Maharashtra
    Diabetic Since (dd-mm-yyyy):
    11Mar 98
    Diabetes Type:
    Type 2
    कोहली अनुष्का से-
    अनुष्का जरा चाय देना डार्लिंग:namaste::namaste:
    अनुष्का थाली में चाय लाती है।।
    विराट- कप कहा है??

    अनुष्का- कप तो तेरा बाप सरफराज ले गया अब थाली में पी।।।:D:D:D:D
     
    S_antosh, Recyan and ghanshyam singh like this.
Loading...
Similar Threads
  1. shashikantiyengar
    Replies:
    5
    Views:
    67
  2. shashikantiyengar
    Replies:
    0
    Views:
    12
  3. shashikantiyengar
    Replies:
    1
    Views:
    21
  4. Jugnu M Shah
    Replies:
    10
    Views:
    190
  5. Ramgopal
    Replies:
    1
    Views:
    33
  6. elle jay
    Replies:
    14
    Views:
    158
  7. shashikantiyengar
    Replies:
    4
    Views:
    52
  8. shashikantiyengar
    Replies:
    4
    Views:
    43
  9. Ramgopal
    Replies:
    22
    Views:
    169
  10. MRA13
    Replies:
    12
    Views:
    203

Share This Page